This comes to us via our friend Nicky, who writes: "Is it just me and my disgusting mind, or does this look like, an, *ahem* used feminine-hygiene-product-on-a-ring?"We now know what to collectively get her for her next birthday.
Best peen-related idea ever. Colour coordinate with matching boob bowls for extra win.
Why bother spending time crocheting ear tufts and attaching whiskers when you could just do a neat little flow of blood. Best given to children you want to turn into successful psychopaths.
...to make you very afraid, for our beloved witchlet sperm with an axe are a lethal combination and we had to warn you.
Grab a handful of ASCII-style boob each time you burn something in the kitchen. ( . )( . ) for all.
Prefer to have your tits on show? These delightful boob stud earrings may be exactly what you're looking for.
Not enough crafty types (who like boob-themed accessories & homewares) use beads as nipples. I feel it's very effective. Take this Boob Cuff. See? Beads for nips. Excellent.
US$34 from ItsMyBag at Etsy.
The seller of this neat little set writes:This crocheted set comes with 2 innies (vagina and anus) and 2 outies (penis and tongue).
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Penises, Vaginas and Anuses are available in four colours-- peach, tan, brown or dark brown. Tongues are available in light or dark pink.
A thoughtful gift for someone with an exotic nose or a nursing mother, perhaps. The seller croons:A unique OOAK stylish hat for this winter.
Like an underwater garden of sea grasses and sparkles, it's like diving deep in tropical waters and being refreshed by blueness.
At OOF we take festivities seriously. If we could be bothered to have a Christmas tree, we would. But instead we'll settle for this designer light fitting, which has enough shiny glowing spermlets to delight even the most discerning sperm connoisseurs.
To our eternal delight, one of the gifts we have received includes a witchlet sperm from the legendary maker of Ballerina Sperm. Love.
) from freezedriedevil at Etsy.
The look on the seller's face says it all but in case you need more convincing "It is stuffed with polyester fiberfill so it's 'plushy' to the touch". A must for every glovebox.
"Do you know someone that would just love to sleep under a blanket of boobs? Then this is for them. The holidays are not that far away and this would make someone's Christmas or birthday extra special."
From the seller who brought us ballerina sperm, a plush amigurumi vagina pouch with teeth and 4 crocheted sperm. We heart it!
Seller's description includes the following:Eyeballs (complete with gooey bits) are crocheted with acrylic yarn.We do wonder if a miniature fork stuck in one of them would cost extra.
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WHEN ORDERING, PLEASE SPECIFY EYE COLOR AND BLOODSHOT OR NOT BLOODSHOT
This boob bowl is not only going to bring the boys to the yard, it's going to empty their pockets and poke their eyes out with fierce crocheted nips.
