Delicious decapitated heads

If we were felines, we'd be rubbing our paws in glee at these beautifully constructed decapitated head toys. The seller agrees:

My cat used to bring me dead things, and as much as I'd love to validate my cat's pride, I could not keep the bird carcass in front of the door. I figured all could win with this decapitated mouse head. I get to see her flex her mean skills and she gets to annihilate something.

You get three heads of your choice. Please indicate which heads you would like in the notes to seller. If none are indicated you get one of each.These de'cat'pitated heads are made with felt, poly-fil, organic cat nip and several gooey/oozy/bloody yarn neck bits.

Nom nom. Sigh. Perhaps in our next life.

US$25 from spellwell at Etsy.

Headless Cat - Crochet Stuffed Animal

Why bother spending time crocheting ear tufts and attaching whiskers when you could just do a neat little flow of blood. Best given to children you want to turn into successful psychopaths.

US$22 from VoodooBunnyCreations at Etsy.

Multi Severed Head Launcher

Deluxe Head Launcher. This towering style multi head launcher is a special model. The large severed heads are fired off of two reloadable, spring-action prongs fixed on the front of the machine. More heads are stored inside a compartment within the tank. Many heads can be launched at a great pace creating a cavalcade of panic stricken terror.

Somebody please make this genius apparatus into reality. Or at least ask the seller to make prints, to be hung around inspirational offices worldwide.

US$20 from nightmaretank at Etsy.