Somewhere, in a land far, far away (but probably on another version of this bottle) there is a leopard-print polar bear looking for a piece of broken leopard-print ice on the crimson river depicted here. It is looking to jump on the leopard-print ice and be happy and joyous and sing praise to the leopard-print gods.
Once upon a time, all available genies got roped into a housing scheme where they exchanged their comfy brass lamps for bottles like these. Then there were no more genies and noone knew why, but we have our suspicions.
Your very own phallic friend, made from blue pyrex glass. Replete with various skin ailments for that special touch, and this in the description:You will break your pelvic bone before this baby even gets a scratch (it is extremely unlikely that you will break your pelvic bone while using this, unless your arm has the force of a jack hammer ;-)US$62.50 from InfiniteCosmosGirl at Etsy.
What H. C. Andersen forgot to mention about The Snow Queen was that she liked to wear glass rings that were made from her pimples. She was a dedicated blackhead extractor and skin torturer and had to have some of her favourite comedones immortalised in ice-cold glass.
